It makes me sick

I was going to take the weekend off from blogging, just because I feel like I've been expounding here more often than not lately and I kind of needed a break from the computer. But then, I went and watched Sicko this afternoon, and I feel the need to say something. Maybe vent. But to say SOMETHING.

I have enjoyed most of Michael Moore's stuff (save that short lived TV show he did) but have recognized it for what it is: documentary with a sensationalistic edge. Granted, I usually agree with what he's saying, but it's still my responsibility to look at it critically and make sure I'm not totally being taken for a ride. In all of Moore's documentaries, it's pretty well established that he has taken some facts and figures and presented them in a way that lends credence to the point he's trying to make. And really, who can blame him? It's his movie and he's trying to make a point, so to claim that making documentary that has bias in it is somehow morally reprehensible is a bit of a head scratcher for me.

Anyway, Sicko hit very close to home for me, by and large because I am in health care. It's what puts food on the table and keeps the lights on in our house. And while Moore takes aim primarily at managed care and HMOs and health insurance compaines, we are all part of that system, so in the end, we are all a little bit culpable for some of the things that Moore exposes. A lot of the cases that Moore shows us in Sicko are nothing short of horrific. Health insurance claims denied through hocus-pocus on the part of the insurance company. Bonuses given to medical directors that denied the most claims, Plans cancelled because of trumped up charges that the enrollees hadn't disclosed "pre-existing conditions" like a treated yeast infection. What I witnessed in Sicko is that these corporations basically have the power to decide who lives and who dies, who gets life saving treatment and who does not. It's putting a price tag on human lives which to me is, well, sickening.

Of course, this is not breaking news either to me or to the country at large. I've had plenty of experience dealing the insurance companies both as a consumer and in the course of my work. Just last summer, prior to starting kindergarten, Anna got the raft of immunizations that all school bound kids need. Not a one was covered by my insurance (I hadn't met my deductible.) They would rather pay for her to have polio than pay for the shot. Professionally, I don't deal with third parties on a daily basis in my current job, but when I worked in retail pharmacy it was a daily battle. And when a claim didn't get paid or a copay went up, guess who bore the brunt of the patient anger and dissatisfaction? You guessed it. 's one of the reasons that I work in hospital even though you work Christmas and weekends and overnights. I just can't take the interference of third party payers in the doctor-patient relationship. And, I'll be honest, I don't like getting yelled at.

Just looking at the pharmacy in the UK that Moore visits made me want to move there tomorrow. My favorite line of the whole movie is when Moore asks him where the bread, milk and detergent are and the pharmacist says, "I haven't been trained for that many years to be selling detergent." That was ALWAYS how I felt when I worked in retail pharmacy, and honestly, where I worked was a pretty good work environment. I can't tell you how many calls the pharmacy would get for Beanie Babies back in the late 90s when I was working part time to pay for my Pharm.D.

Moore focuses a lot on the uninsured people of America, but what about those of us that have health insurance? I'll be honest, a catastrophic illness in our family would be devastating financially to us and I bet to a lot of families like ours. Sure, I may pay only 10% of the total hospital bill, but (as I'm fond of saying) 10% of a lot is still a lot. So we think we're safe, but really, we're not, which I think is even worse.

We've been brainwashed for 50 years to think that a government run health care system is evil incarnate. Moore shows us the Canadian, UK, and Cuban systems which are free to their citizens. Granted, he shows us the sunny side of it, and there's certainly more to it than what he shows, but compared to what we have here (which basically amounts to bankruptcy-by-health-care), it seems like its worth a try.

There is no quick fix, that's ultimately the saddest point in the movie. We can't pass universal health care tomorrow. I know that I'm not the best person in the world to be reviewing this movie because I'm not objective, but the way insurance companies view their job in this country is appalling. We should be ashamed of ourselves. We should be ashamed of our system that really is broken, despite all the fancy equipment and cutting edge drugs. We should be ashamed because we're letting the least of us down, and for a nation that puts so much emphasis on family values, we should be disgusted.

Me and my girl

Taken yesterday afternoon when we were goofing around with Photo Booth on the MacBook (again.) I just love this picture.

And because it's not a Photo Booth session without a goofball picture, here's what we came up with.

Shouldn't I have all of this

Prompted by my recent ranking of my top 5 albums, I was listening to Mary Chapin Carpenter in as I beautified myself this morning. "I Feel Lucky" came on and I was immediately reminded of the video, which I think was one of the first videos I saw on VH1 in my dorm room at Iowa. I was tempted to post it, just for the nuts of it, but then, I got to thinking, "I wonder if the video for 'Passionate Kisses' is on YouTube?" A quick search yielded this result.



What an amazing video, and not for the reasons you would expect. It's not loaded with special effects or celebrity guests. Mostly, it's ust MCC and a bunch of anonymous people. But for whatever reason, it really got to me this morning. Chapin almost always tends a bit toward the melancholy, but this song? Pure joy. A demand to the universe that she can have it all. I love how autumnal the video is, with the leaves whipping around her. An MCC is just beautiful - and not in the supermodel way that so many stars are. She's real. She's a WOMAN and not a stick insect as Bridget Jones might say. She's another one of those celebrities that I wish I could meet because they seem so genuine, but as always, it's a good idea to keep your distance from people you admire in that way lest they disappoint.

My favorite part of the song is this part:

Do I want too much?
Am I going overboard to want that touch?
Shout it out to the night
Give me what I deserve
Cuz it's my right.

I was doing some reading last night about that North Node in Capricorn thing that Heidi was blogging and I have to remember those last three lines. So frequently, I just sacrifice and sacrifice and sacrifice, hoping that someone will notice. Well, guess what? All that sacrifice is a cold consolation because I'm the only one that notices. And truthfully, that's also not taking very good care of myself because if I'm not taking care of me, I certainly can't take care of anyone else.

So anyway, off to work. And to think, I didn't even hear "Passionate Kisses" in the bathroom this morning.

Thus spake Zarathustra

In an attempt to prove that I did more than just hang out at the computer all day on my day off, I plowed through the final third of 3001: The Final Odyssey this afternoon. I have always loved the Odyssey books, having read 2001: A Space Odyssey during my last year of college. I watched the movie shortly thereafter. I recall journaling shortly after watching it that I wished I could have been one of those stoned out hippies that laid down on the floor of the theater during the final act when it was first released. Seriously, it's one bizarre film, critically maligned at the time only to be appreciated later.

Well, after I read that book, I inhaled 2010: Odyssey Two and 2061: Odyssey Three. 2010 is quite good, going a long way toward explaining the monoliths and what exactly their purpose was. Perhaps Arthur C. Clarke felt the need to be a bit more clear than he was in the original novel. 2061 is much more in the vein of a traditional sci-fi novel, only set in the Odyssey universe.

I don't know, I just think the Odyssey universe is so cool, and I'm not a huge reader of sci-fi. The concept of a Jupiter nova-ing into a second Sun (Lucifer) so that life could flourish on Europa is quite cool. The entire concept of the monolith as the providing the spark for human evolution, followed by the unearthing of the Sentinel monolith on the moon 4 million years later. It all just falls together so nicely. Clarke is quite a good author, although I will admit that I have not enjoyed any of his other books nearly as much as I have enjoyed the Odyssey series.

3001: The Final Odyssey came out not all that long after I finished reading the original trilogy. I resisted it, feeling like it really wasn't necessary, and plus, they were reviving a character that died in the original novel 1000 years after his death. It just didn't seem like a very engaging plot device, so consequently, I never read it. I bought all the other Odyssey books, but never even borrowed 3001 from the library. Having read it, my skepticism was not entirely reasonable. The story is quite serviceable and the revival of the aforementioned character from 2001 actually works out quite well for several reasons that revealing would spoil the story.

I felt like the book unraveled a bit toward the end, with the existence of humanity threatened for rather nebulous reasons with WAY too tidy of a wrap up, but still, it was more than worth the time to put a cap on the series.

And while doing Google searches for this post, I came upon this. Which just goes to show that there's a conspiracy theory out there for just about everyone. Of course, I couldn't stop reading that page as it was right up my alley. A real Lucifer? Surely not! And judging from some of the techheads on the net discussing it, it's not gonna happen.

High drama

Someone is obviously channeling Evanescence on their latest album cover.

Wow, could this cover be just a titch more dramatic? Although Sarah Brightman is quite pretty, she looks like she could sink her fangs into your neck at any given point.

The album itself is a bit of a mixed bag. I love "Fleurs du Mal" for the same reason I love the album cover. Plus Sarah Brightman, despite the fact that she is best known as the voice behind Christine in The Phantom Of The Opera, has undeniable vocal prowess and the ability to sing the hell out of a song without beating it into submission. But still, a little Sarah goes a long way with me.

They say it's your birthday

A big old happy 33rd birthday to my brother Ryan. 33 years ago today, the second kid in our family arrived, and well, he turned out pretty darn good! One of the highlights of 2007 was our trip to Phoenix to see him and his wife (and also get some severely discounted dental work done for Heidi.) Plus I got a free cleaning to boot.

So here's to the only brother I have. I can't believe you're 33, but to be honest, 36 is starting to freak me out just a teeny bit.

And in honor of his birthday, here's the R-rated 80s band from break.com. It's a video that Ryan showed me on one of their trips back to Iowa, and every time we watch it, it's like watching it for the first time. That's probably because Ryan wishes he had made this video.

The audio is NSFW unless you're the boss (like Ryan is) or you're wearing headphones.


R Rated 80s Band - Watch more free videos

Happy birthday, bro!

Five albums

My friend Matt recently posted (on his brand-spanking new blog) about the white board in his cubicle and how it serves as a bit of a water cooler in his office. Over the past couple of weeks, he and his co-workers spent time listing their top 5 favorite TV shows, and when this had run its course, someone came in and laid down a fresh gauntlet - the top 5 albums of all time. When I first heard this challenge, I winced a bit. How could I possibly narrow down the lifetime of music that really has helped shape who I am today to five records? Plus, I was immediately reminded of my sister's natural aversion to the phrase "best [blank] of all time" because seriously, have you seen every movie and heard every album ever made? Not likely.

So instead, it boils down to the top 5 albums of all time according to Dan or Matt or whoever is making the list. I read his post yesterday before work and I chewed on what my answers would be for quite a while. I knew that a Madonna album would certainly make the top five. But which one? Do I go for the critical acclaim of Like A Prayer? Or the edgy Erotica? Or do I give in to temptation and name Confessions On A Dance Floor to the list? Tough stuff. And then came the problem of what would round out the top 5? To make matters worse, another stipulation of the list was naming a guilty pleasure album, "an album that you would still defend to this day." Wow, was I up to the challenge?

After much deliberation, this is what I came up with. Of course, in a month's time, I may change my mind, and there were a couple that I completely forgot about (Bella Donna would have probably been number six), but FWIW, here it is.

1) Confessions on a Dance Floor - Madonna
What can I write about this record that I haven't already written before? It merits the number one slot because I am still listening to it like it came out last week over 2 years later. In my 25 years of Madonna fandom, there is not a single album that has been played as much as this one has. From start to finish, a tour de force from Madge and one hell of an album to have to follow up come April of this year.

2) Savage - Eurythmics
Of all of Eurythmics albums, this is the one that has stuck with me through the years. I have never really wavered from it being my favorite of all of their albums, even though it was one of their least successful. Annie Lennox as the schizophrenic housewife-turned-blond-bimbo is just the perfect point to leap into the album. Fine songwriting, great production and wonderful vocals from Annie. A dark and enticing album if given the chance.

3) Come On Come On - Mary Chapin Carpenter
This was the album that got me into Chapin, and therefore, will always hold a special place in my heart. It was Chapin at the height of her commercial appeal, so some would argue that it should be demerited for that, but who says that a great album can't appeal to a large section of people? From the country-pop of "Passionate Kisses" to the somber "I Am A Town", there is simply not a bad song on here.

4) In My Tribe - 10,000 Maniacs
In one of my first forays beyond pop radio in high school, I came upon the Maniacs and In My Tribe hit me at just the right time in my life. Socially conscious thoughts set to a jangle pop sensibility. Arguably, 10,000 Maniacs never matched this record in terms of quality and consistency. And as I've written before, it contains the single happiest song ever written about seasonal affective disorder.

5) Stoney End - Barbra Streisand
Now, before anyone thinks that this is the guilty pleasure album, think again. Streisand has this enormous catalog that contains a lot of really good albums as well as some real stinkers. Her best albums are probably the hits albums at they extract the best songs from some ho-hum albums and put them all together, making them sound great. But Stoney End, for whatever reason, is an album I keep on coming back to. Streisand turns her back on standards and show tunes and embraces folk-pop-rock. Believe it or not, it actually worked, and it worked well. Riddled with memories of college for me, I am seriously considering getting a turntable just so I can play the vinyl copy I have.

And as if there weren't enough guilty pleasures in that set, my guilty pleasure album is...

The Sign - Ace Of Base
"All That She Wants" was inescapable during the fall of 1993. It sounded like nothing else on the radio at the time, but was instantly accessible. There is no better way to get your early 90s on than to pull out Ace of Base. And on those grounds alone, I will defend The Sign until my dying breath. It's an album not likely to make many best-of lists, but it sure makes mine.

So that's it. And head over to Matt's blog, okay? He's a cool dude.

Trash karma

So today before work, Heidi and I went out on a hot date to Panera for breakfast. It was not exactly budgeted and in light of how the bills turned out, probably ill-advised, but what the hell, it was loads of fun. That's one of the benefits of having Anna in school full time. When I work late, we can actually do stuff like that. Just like we used to before we had kids.

Anyway, we're sitting at the table, and Heidi says to me "Oh my God, bad karma! That lady just threw the trash from her car out her window and onto the parking lot!" I couldn't believe it and nearly didn't, until we saw her do it AGAIN. Now, I firmly believe that all things you do come back at you threefold, so this lady is going to have a lot paying to do later. Heidi said that she will probably spill something on her shirt later in the day and wonder why. My thought was to take my tray full of dirty plates and cups and ask her if she would mind if I dumped it in her car. To that Heidi says "Hmm...passive aggressive much? No, wait a minute, that's just aggressive."

As it turned out, there was a table of older guys a ways down from us and they were all watching the activities unfold with the same kind of astonishment that we were. It was kind of funny how this lady probably thought she was getting away with murder, but we were all watching. Or perhaps she didn't find anything wrong with what she was doing, which is a hundred times worse.

A part of me wanted to go out and pick up the trash she had chucked out of her car and tap on her window saying "Excuse me, miss, but I think you dropped this." However, the north wind was howling today so the trash was probably half way to Ankeny by the time I thought of it.

The things you see. Amazing.

Driving in your car

Happened across this tonight while looking to see if Darren Hayes has announced his US dates. It's the brand-spanking new video for "Casey." I could sing the praises of this video, but I'll let it speak for itself.



I just love it when artists make videos in the classic sense. It seems to happen so infrequently these days!

Friday is Monday

It's Friday morning, but as I mentioned last night, it feels more like a Monday.

I was reading Michael Lutin today, and if you lend any credence to any kind of astrological stuff, today could seriously be a humdinger. Here, read for yourself (courtesy of michaellutin.com and the only reason I'm not linking to it is because it will disappear before too long.)

tick freakin' tock tick freakin' tock tick freakin' tock
You may have noticed a change in tone and mood
it's getting serious now
no joke
there's a sense of urgency
to gather your nuts and store them in your nest
even if you can't move as fast as you'd like,
as if, no matter what hemisphere you live in,
it is becoming winter
no more jerking around
if you're ever going to do anything
it's got to be now
now that both Venus and Jupiter have moved into Capricorn
no more superficial nonsense
A celestial event far more rare than Halley's Comet, occurs
today
Friday, January 25th at 10:44PM EST
(saturday in Asia, Africa and Europe)
oh, it's just a little thing
Pluto, recently downgraded by astronomers from planetary status
moves into the zodiacal sign of Capricorn.
“This transit has not occurred since the time of Paul Revere.
Over the next 15 years all relationships, business and personal, for everybody will be transformed.”
Even though you can't see it with the naked eye, Pluto is sending you on a new course.
Whatever you've been doing up until now, it's over. So fasten your seat belt The ride is about to start.”
tonight
22.44 est
it may seem like a tiny change
but the events of this week are life-altering
in business and personal life

Whoa. That's all I can say. (plus, wouldn't "Hung Up" just that much better if she sang "tick freakin' tick tock it's a quarter to freakin' two"?) Y'know, I'm really torn on the whole astrology thing. It's yet another of those things that I so desperately want to believe, but the scientist and skeptic in me is having a hard time getting my head around it. I think there is so much more to it than the stupid horoscopes that you read in the newspaper that are so generic they could apply to anyone reading them. "Real astrology" is more concerned with seeing you live out your full potential. I have to say that it's all Heidi's fault that I'm even interested in it at all, that I'm giving more and more thought to spending 30 bucks to have a full chart done. Because seriously, if there's anything to it, anything at all, wouldn't it be good to know?

I think the thing that makes it hard, especially for me, is that there is no way to objectively measure anything involved with astrology. At risk of sounding all 70s and "what's your sign?" I am very interested in learning more about not only my sign (Gemini -which fits me to a bloody tee) but also my rising sign and my moon sign and what they mean. Get much past that and my eyes start to glaze over and I'm lost. Which is why I think that either having someone who does that kind of thing for a living would be a smart thing for me to do, so that it can be put into terms that I can understand.

It's really too bad that all that kind of stuff is written off as psychic mumbo-jumbo, even by me at times. I am just way too much of a science head in that "if we can't measure it, we can't prove it" is very much my mantra. But the Fox Mulder portion of me (which, despite what I say, is significant) is just dying for all that stuff to be true, to have something to believe in that is beyond the realm of science. It would be nice if all this stuff could be integrated. Heidi and I were just talking about this before bed last night, how nice would it be if your physical, mental, and emotional health were all under an umbrella of medicine, therapy, and metaphysical things like energy therapy and astrology and what not. As Heidi was saying, perhaps that's what the Age of Aquarius really is all about.

I know, I sound like I'm off my rocker, especially for someone like me whose brain is too analytical for its own good. But there are so many things in this world we can't explain through rational scientific method, that it's hard for me to write off.

All I can say is that I'm really glad I'll be at home at 22:44 EST tonight.

Accomplishing nothing

As I hinted in my previous post (and kudos to everyone who has participated!), I have not really accomplished anything of any real significance today. Even though tomorrow is Friday, it is really Monday as it begins a 5 day stretch of work. I'm working kind of crappy shifts but I traded into the evening shift over the weekend because of a previous commitment so I really have no one to blame but myself.

I got a Best Buy gift card from Heidi's grandparents for Christmas this year. Anymore, there is so little at Best Buy that I want that I'd almost rather have a Borders card, but beggars can't be choosers. So a while back, I bought an iTunes card with it and have been slowly whittling away at it. I always like to use those to buy a song here and a song there rather than whole albums. So far, I've bought 4 songs: "Ride The Ride" by The Bangles, "Freedom Dance (Get Free!)" by Vanessa Williams (*hangs head in shame*), "Nick of Time" by Bonnie Raitt and "Quiet Evening" by Carly Simon. It's just like buying 45s!

We're reading Beezus and Ramona to Anna at night. She's almost to the point where her attention span can handle chapter books. In any event, I was SHOCKED to find out that Beverly Cleary is still living. She's 91 and still kicking.

I have not broken the news on this blog (although Heidi has on hers) but come February 4th, we are entering the 21st century and getting DirectTV, complete with 100 hours of DVR. 200 channels, nothing but cats. Actually, 200 channels and there STILL won't be anything on. But the best part is because it's bundled in with our long distance and internet, WE AREN'T PAYING ANY EXTRA! We are excited though because there are so many things that I just don't get because I don't watch cable. It's part of why I let my EW subscription lapse - I got so sick and tired of it always being about TV!

Backwoods Barbie is coming out on February 26th, a mere two days before Heidi and I head to Minneapolis to see Dolly Parton. This is the album cover:

I'm not sure what to think. I do know that she covers the Fine Young Cannibals' "She Drives Me Crazy." It seems like a bad idea on paper, but so did her cover of "Stairway to Heaven" and that turned out quite fine and dandy.

It is fucking cold out tonight. And that's all I have to say on that subject. My folks are in Vegas and I bet they are glad for it.

Sicko is coming from Netflix tomorrow. Not that I'll have time to sit down and watch it till next Wednesday, but we'll see how it goes. I'll admit that I have shied away from it as I have had trouble with a lot of the sensational news and political stories these days (don't even get me started on the election!) but Matt watched it last week and was wondering what my reaction to it was as a health care person. I had to admit that I hadn't watched it, so I rescued it from Netflix-queue-hell.

So this has been 4 blog posts in one day. That will make up for the near certain dearth of posts over the next several days.

Song lyrics meme - part three

It's audience participation time around here! Yuri has been doing a great "mystery song" Monday feature which got me thinking about this again. It has been forever since I've done this, and because I've gotten absolutely nothing of any consequence done on my day off today, I thought I'd continue in that vein. It's time for another song lyrics meme. By now, you know the drill:

Step 1: Put your iPod/MP3 player or iTunes on random.
Step 2: Post the first line(s) from the first 20 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing the song. (I took out any instrumental songs, natch, as well as any song where the title is uttered in the first line, so it's not entirely the first 20 songs that came up.)
Step 3: Post and let everyone you know guess what song and artist the lines come from. (Those guessing the songs should post in the comments or shoot me an e-mail.)
Step 4: I'll strike out the songs when someone guesses correctly and post the title in bold after the stricken song when it is guessed.
Step 5: (for those guessing the songs) If you look up the lyrics on Google or any other search engine, that's called cheating, so don't do it!

So here are the songs:

#1 - Time, time, time/See what's become of me "Hazy Shade of Winter" - The Bangles (guessed by Yuri and Adem)

#2 - I don't know why, I don't know how/I thought I loved you but I'm not sure now. "Domino Dancing" - Pet Shop Boys (guessed by Lucas who was too shy to post a comment.)

#3 - I really should be saying good night/I really shouldn't stay anymore/It's been so long since I held ya/I've forgotten what love is for. "Trouble" - Lindsey Buckingham (guessed by Matt)

#4 - If you could be so kind/To help me find my mind/I'd like to thank you in advance. "Lost Mind" - Diana Krall (guessed by Paul)

#5 - There comes a time/When you should see things clear/Free from my innocence/There is no circumstance too severe. "Le Bel Age" - Pat Benatar (guessed by Paul)

#6 - Life is a moment in space/When the dream is gone/It's a lonelier place. "Woman In Love" - Barbra Streisand (guessed by Lucas and Adem)

#7 - Our step mom we did everything to hate her/She took us down to the edge of ********/We saw the lion and the kangeroo take her/Down to the river where they caught a wild alligator. "Decatur, or Round of Applause for Your Stepmother!" by Sufjan Stevens (guessed by Paul)

#8 - I walked into the club last night/I hadn't been there for so long/Thinking foolishly I might find you sitting all alone/But oh, how dreams lie "No Two Ways About It" - Pam Tillis (guessed by Paul)

#9 - Neon shines through smokey eyes tonight/It's 2 A.M., I'm drunk again/And it's heavy on my mind Grace Is Gone - Dave Matthews Band (guessed by ooshiny)

#10 - Dreaming/I must be dreaming/Or am I really lying here with you? "I Just Fall In Love Again" - Anne Murray (guessed by Randy. Paul came close, guessing the Carpenters who also did a version of this song)

#11 - Looking through my old drawer/Came across the letter you wrote/Said you needed time away/That was so long ago "Come Back To Me" - Janet Jackson (guessed by Lucas and Caryle)

#12 - Her hair is Harlow gold/Her lips sweet surprise. "Bette Davis Eyes" - Kim Carnes (guessed by Yuri and Lucas)

#13 - She was standing at the front door/When I came home last night/A good book in her left hand/And a rollin' pin in the right. One More Last Chance - Vince Gill (guessed by Heidi who had an unfair advantage because I was singing it while cleaning up the kitchen earlier.)

#14 - Lay a whisper on my pillow/Leave the winter on the ground/I wake up lonely. Is there a silence/In the bedroom and all around? "It Must Have Been Love" - Roxette (guessed by Yuri)

#15 - A prisoner of your love/Entangled in your web/Hot whispers in the night/I'm captured by your spell. "Better Be Good To Me" - Tina Turner (guessed by Yuri and Lucas)

#16 - Desperately seeking someone, willing to travel/You're lost in conversation and useless at Scrabble/Happiness will never last/Darkness comes to kick your ass "Your Disco Needs You" - Kylie Minogue (guessed by Yuri and Adem)

#17 - I feel a hunger/It's a hunger that tries to keep a man awake at night./Are you the answer?/I shouldn't wonder when I feel you whet my appetite "Take Me Home Tonight" - Eddie Money (guessed by Lucas)

#18 - Won't you come see about me?/I'll be alone, dancing you know it baby/Tell me your troubles and doubts/Giving me everything, inside and out. "Don't You Forget About Me" - Simple Minds (guessed by Yuri and Lucas)

#19 - Knew you'd be here tonight/So I put my best dress on/Boy, I was so right. Slow - Kylie Minogue (guessed by Daniel)

#20 - Sitting on the front porch on a summer afternoon/In a straight backed chair on two legs/Leaned against the wall.

OK, it's up to you guys from this point. I'll keep the post updated as best I can. These songs pretty much run the gamut across all genres and they all came from my iTunes, so that's pretty much no help at all when it comes to narrowing them down.

And dream of semis

I stayed up too late last night and then had a hard time falling asleep once I finally did go to bed. Once I fell asleep, did I dream or what? Usually, I have a hard time remembering my dreams, but I woke up from this one in the middle of the night and now I wish I had written it down because I only remember parts of it now that morning has arrived. All I can say is that it was bizarre in the extreme.

What I do remember is that somehow, for some reason, I was part of the orchestra pit in the musical version of Convoy. I know. I need therapy. I've never even seen the movie and haven't heard the song in an age! At any rate, it was me and my buddy Yuri. (sorry, Yuri, not sure why you were dragged into that insanity!) We had signed up for this, but as we got involved in it, we realized that there WASN'T a musical version of Convoy, and that it was up to us to get the songs written and the plot developed and hire the actors and everything because they had booked a world tour of the show! With none of the particulars figured out! And they expected us, measly members of the pit, to come up with this.

Well, the next thing I know, the shows are being put on, but instead of being put on in a theater or an auditorium, but rather, they were all roadside on various interstates. What I remember are hundreds and hundreds of semi trucks lined up on the side of the road. And the orchestra pit? Well, it was a hole dug in the shoulder of the road. I was on the piano and I was not in the pit, for I distinctly remember the rush of the semis as they tore past me at 70 miles an hour just inches behind my back while the song "Convoy" was playing. I was nervous for my hearing as well because it was so damn loud.

And hanging on all these trucks were rednecks of every shape and sort. Yuri and I had to try to fit in with them, which got increasingly difficult as the dream went on, but we were making great money because the show was a huge hit, despite the fact that I felt like I was in extreme peril every night and a hair's breadth from being creamed by a semi.

I remembered so much more about it in the middle of the night and I'm kicking myself for not writing it down then, but then I probably would have been awake for the duration and, contrary to what I like to believe, I do need sleep to stay alive. But what an odd mess of imagery. I'm one of those folks that believes that your subconscious can speak to you through dreams, but I'm a bit baffled by this one. I can't stop thinking about the trucks being so close and although I was scared, it was also exhilarating. Food for thought, I'm certain.

So if my subconscious was speaking to me last night, it certainly was speaking in tongues. But Yuri? Nice to see you. :)

The limit of our sight

A bit of a new look tonight. Not really new, but it is blue and chilly and very winterlike, no? I also updated the blogroll and alphabetized everybody so no one can accuse me of playing favorites. Of course, Heidi is still at the top of the list because, well, that's just how it is.

Tonight, I had this huge hankering to listen to an album that I have not pulled off the shelf in probably 10 years. It's so strange when things like that happen, and it happens very frequently to me. Perhaps I should think about therapy. Or perhaps it's just an attractive little quirk. I prefer to think that it's the latter.

Anyway, the album in question was Carly Simon's Have You Seen Me Lately? It's from 1990, my first year of college and it was her pop/adult contemporary/soft rock follow-up to Coming Around Again, an album that is widely regarded as her comeback. I run very hot and cold on Carly Simon. She has an aggravatingly uneven track record when it comes to her music. Her albums are either completely aces or complete duds. There really is no in between for me. Coming Around Again falls in the former category, as does Letters Never Sent and Have You Seen Me Lately? Carly Simon albums in the latter category include My Romance, The Bedroom Tapes, and Spoiled Girl (double yuck to that last one.) So I'm hardly a dyed-in-the-wool Carly Simon fan. Mostly, I appreciate her.

But Have You Seen Me Lately? crept back into my consciousness for reasons I can't fully elucidate. I think, for whatever reason, I was thinking of one of my favorite lines in the last song on the album, "We Just Got Here." In the song, Carly writes that "Hugo is twisting his way up the coast." I've always liked the picture that lyric gives me. It calms Hurricane Hugo, which at the time was the costliest hurricane in U.S. history. Instead of the fury of a category 5 hurricane, I get this image of a slow, almost lazy rotation. Kind of a strange thing to think about when thinking of an album, but what can I say?

Listening to the album now, I really had forgotten how good it was, even though I distinctly recall not liking it as much as I had Coming Around Again when I first got it. I remember my friend Kelly mocking the album cover, teasing me about how Carly had definitely hired a personal trainer (probably true.) It has a very "midlife" vibe to it and considering she was 45 at the time of its release, there is probably some validity to that theory.

There are some really good songs on here, notably "Waiting At The Gate" and "Holding Me Tonight." But the song that really got me tonight was "Life Is Eternal." I remember this being one of those songs that I didn't really get at age 18, but now, at age 35, I am starting to see it. The chorus sums it up.

Life is eternal, love is immortal
And death is only the horizon.
And the horizon is nothing
Save the limit of our sight.

This is something that's important for me to bear in mind, especially in light of the events of the last few days. Not that there have been earthquakes here or anything, but let's just say that I had a figurative wake-up call from the universe today - a few of you know what I'm speaking of. Many would accuse me of reading too much into it, but the universe has odd ways of getting your attention when the conventional ways fail. I'm very fond of wiping the slate clean and starting fresh with a reboot, only to descend back into old patterns 35 years in the making. So tonight is another of those points of reboot. I'm prepared to be back here in a day or a week or a month saying exactly the same thing, but the thing is to keep on getting back on the horse.

This 18 year old Carly Simon album was a perfect companion for this. What an unexpected pleasure.

Parental rites of passage

So it's Monday night, I've had a hell of a day at work (nothing serious, just the usual) and Heidi has also had a trying day. What I'd like most to do is collapse on the couch with a Stella Artois and wait for sleep to arrive.

But no, I have to go to a school concert.

I will probably go straight to the bottom circle of hell for this, but I would rather be beaten senseless than go and listen to grade school kids sing about Martin Luther King, Jr.

However, I will do it, because this is what parents do for their kids. I remember my parents dutifully going to every school function of mine when I'm sure they had about the same level of desire that I have for the program tonight. I will say that I spared my parents having to go to sports events because, well, I pretty much sucked at all sports and still do to this day. But my folks did have to sit through piano recitals which has earned them a spot in heaven.

It won't be that bad because it's only an hour long, it's just kind of a bad night for it. The snow's coming down and I work early tomorrow so I have no idea how I'm going to get the driveway cleared. I could go out now, but I liken shoveling the driveway while the snow is still coming down to drying off in the shower before you turn off the water. It just doesn't make any sense. I love the snow and all, but seriously, this is getting kind of ridiculous.

How can you not love this?

Heidi has posted the Barrowman-Marsters kiss a few times, so I don't feel so bad about going on and on about Rose McGowan and her machine gun leg! If you can't see the coolness in this, well, I'm not sure that there are words that will convince you.

So I managed to finish Grindhouse: Planet Terror this afternoon on the laptop while I was waiting for the car's oil to get changed. There was so much to like about it, I'm not even sure where to start. It wasn't a perfect movie, that's for certain, but it really spoke to my inner 12-year old boy, the part of me that just wants to see zombies get killed and people blow shit up.

The short version of the plot is as follows. Release of poisonous gas has deleterious effects on people exposed to it, turning them into zombie-ish, flesh eaters. As the trailer for G:PT states, "They're not living! They're not dead! And they're NOT STOPPING!" Rose McGowan plays a stripper go-go dancer who, along with her boyfriend Wray, leads a rag-tag band of survivors in an attempt to stay alive. And at risk of sounding completely shallow, Rose McGowan was simply HOT in this movie. I think I could have used a cigarette after watching her on the screen for just over 90 minutes. And surprisingly, her acting was not all that bad either.

The movie was gory with a capital G and some of the deaths and splattering and grossness made even me turn away from the screen. It basked in its political incorrectness (although probably not nearly as much as the trailer that preceded the film for Machete which I thought for certain was fake.) The zombies were relentless and disgusting and made mincemeat out of the living characters, only to be splattered all over kingdom come by machine gun fire and rockets and other such stuff later in the picture. Basically, it rocked all over the place.

But my favorite part of watching Planet Terror was how it was filmed. Actual grindhouse theaters usually possessed second or third generation copies of the exploitation films they showed, the films often showed significant signs of wear and tear, with dialogue cutting in and out and scratches on the surface of the film. Through the miracle of modern technology and visual effects, all these things were put into Planet Terror, much to my great delight. That attention to detail really enhanced the viewing experience for me.

Exploitation films are certainly not something to be proud of, but they are an undeniable part of cinema's past. While I'm certain that these kinds of movies are bound to offend a lot of people (but please, when was the last time something Tarantino had a hand in DIDN'T offend someone?), Planet Terror was still a fun throwback to a day gone by. Perhaps we should be thankful for the fact that those days are gone by. But still, Planet Terror did not disappoint me in the slightest.

Now, I just need to get this:My birthday is in June. It's never too early to start shopping. ;)

62

I would be remiss if I let today go by without doing a small birthday tribute to the First Lady of country music, Dolly Parton. She is 62 years old today and still doesn't look a day over, well, I'm not sure what. Anyway, I just love Dolly and have since I was a young kid watching the Dolly Live in London concert on HBO a hundred thousand times.

So in celebration, here's a couple of YouTube clips to enjoy all the greatness that is Dolly. The first is from The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas which I watched ad infinitum as a 12 or 13 year old on HBO as well. Not a great movie by any stretch of the imagination, but I do love this song, especially the part at about 2:50 that starts "And as for pimps!"



And just because it is Dolly at her campiest, here's "Potential New Boyfriend," a song that is in serious need of the remix treatment. I can hear it at The Garden now.

So close yet so far

According to Darren Hayes' MySpace blog, he's going to be doing a handful of U.S. dates in March. What I would give to be able to go to one of those concerts! It's funny, I was never wildly crazy about Savage Garden. I mean, their stuff was pleasant enough and certainly appealed to my pop ear. But I never really liked "Truly Madly Deeply" mostly because I heard it a million and one times on the PA at work when I worked at Drug Town in Iowa City, but songs like "I Knew I Loved You" and "I Want You" are still endearing today despite similar levels of overplay.

Anyway, I have been quite fond of Darren's solo work, especially his last album This Delicate Thing We've Made which is probably tied with Mary Chapin Carpenter's The Calling for the best album of 2007 (according to me which is all that matters here.) I admire him for taking chances and doing music the way he wants to do it, rather than the way a record executive thinks it should be done. In so doing, he has made some memorable music and a near perfect double album, which is no small accomplishment. Sure there are a few songs that don't appeal to me, but how can you dislike an album with a song that manages to work laws of physics into the lyrics? ("If I have understood correctly/velocity equals the distance traveled divided by time.")

So one of the cities that is likely to be announced on this mini-tour of the States is Chicago, which is a drive from Ames, but doable. The thing that makes it not doable is my severe lack of funds for this kind of thing. It costs money to drive to Chicago and I'm sure the tickets won't be free. Plus I am not likely to be able to get the time off of work to do such a thing. I am fond of saying that if I lived in Chicago, I would surely be broke because I would constantly be going to live shows. The biggest reason I am not constantly going to live shows now is because, well, how many of the artists that I really like and want to see are likely to come to Iowa? We get our share of country artists at Wells Fargo Arena in Des Moines and at Hilton Coliseum in Ames, but the artists I like are either too big to need to play the Midwest or are not big enough to guarantee good sales in a rural area like Iowa. So I'm equally screwed from both sides.

Still, it would be fun to see Darren Hayes. But not likely to happen.

Positively Hitchcockian

This was the view out the back door of our house the other day.

Perhaps a little bit of a close-up is in order.

Those birds roosting in the trees are crows, although if they were ravens it would be even cooler. As you can tell, there are just a ton of them that land in the trees from time to time, although they are showing up more frequently these days. Heidi has taken to feeding them, throwing the crusts to Anna's toast out every morning, as well as any bread that goes stale among other things. So I guess they just know where the food is. Still, it was unnerving to see so many of them congregated in one spot.

Plus, I was amazed to find out how closely related crows and ravens are. Seriously, I had no idea.

I may have to Netflix The Birds because of this. God, I'm so suggestible (but Heidi already knew that.)

Bits and pieces

Some random updates:

It's Thursday night and I've worked early for the last three days. I have never been more excited to sleep in than I am tonight for I don't work until the afternoon tomorrow. Of course, that means I will stay up way too late and it'll all come out in the wash anyway and my general state of sleep deprivation will go unchanged.

Heidi was going to straighten my hair again tonight for it's been about 3 months since I last did it and the curl is definitely starting to come back. However, I was looking in the mirror tonight and thought that really, my hair is really straight despite all that. So we're putting it off for now. This is probably for the best as we really should buy new relaxer and I am too cheap to do it. When I was talking to Jill (the lady who cuts my hair) she says that the relaxer just doesn't work as well if you save it. I'm convinced that my hair will either fall out or turn purple if I use it.

I'm thinking about watching at least part of Grindhouse: Planet Terror tonight either before bed or on the laptop in bed. It arrived from Netflix yesterday and I am excited to watch it. I don't know if it'll be any good. I've been told that Grindhouse: Death Proof was only okay, so I'm not sure how good Planet Terror will be. But it's a zombie flick (sort of), and have I mentioned that Rose McGowan takes off her leg and REPLACES IT WITH A MACHINE GUN??

If you'd like to see Heidi go all drooly over guys kissing guys, head over to her blog (but don't read the text if you don't want the first episode of the second season of Torchwood completely spoiled.) First she's kissing Dr. Who in her dreams and now it's Captain Jack and Spike from Buffy kissing each other. Where will it end?

D'Luv and XO helped me locate a blast from the past the other night. I've been looking for the Bizarre, Inc. song "I'm Gonna Get You" because I have this memory of my college roommate singing along to this song in a most hilarious fashion back in the day. And besides, one rarely needs an excuse to, as D'Luv put it, get one's early 90's on. Anyway, they located not just one but two versions of it. Heavenly.

It snowed last night. Again. I got the snowblower out after work tonight and it nearly didn't start. I was about to give up and get out the shovel (a Herculean task with the size of our driveway) when suddenly, the engine turned over and we were in business. The snow was annoying as fuck though. It is that powdery shit that blows all over the place no matter which way you aim the chute. So it only sort of looks like I did something. I, however, was a popsicle at the end of the job.

I have been totally into the Bangles these days, especially their 1988 CD Everything. I'm not sure what prompted it, but there it is. I always friggin' hated "In Your Room" and "Eternal Flame" but there are some great songs on that record. I'm thinking specifically of "Make A Play For Her Now." Yet another pop song in a minor key and I go all melty. Sometimes, I'm just too easy.

And I say that like it's a bad thing.