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Thursday, March 13, 2008

SlacksTrousersPants

I just spent the last 25 minutes with Anna and Heidi, listening while Heidi read from Ramona & Her Mother. Tonight's chapter featured one of my least favorite words in the English language, in fact, it was even in the title. The title of the chapter was "Slacks for Ella Funt" in which Ramona attempts to sew a pair of pants for Ella Funt, her stuffed elephant.

I pretty much cannot stand the word "slacks." For me, it conjures up images of polyester hell pants from the 70s. A friend of mine has a great story regarding his father referring to his jeans as "blue denim slacks." Dear God, there's just no excuse for that. Anyway, the word "slacks" was uttered no less than 30 times in that chapter we read tonight, and every time I heard it, I couldn't help but laugh. This was also the chapter in which Ramona squirts an entire tube of toothpaste into the bathroom sink. It probably would have been more fitting had she squirted a whole tube of salve into the sink, as salve is without a doubt my least favorite word in the entire English language. You should only use that word if you are over 80!! But young people are using it and that disturbs me greatly!

But I must report that I have purchased today what can only be described as a pair of slacks. Taking great advantage of a fantastic sale at Younkers today, I picked up this pair of slacks pants. But what a pair they are!

They are silky shiny like any good pair of slacks should be, but dang, do I look good in them! (sorry, no picture) They are a bit daring without being too much so, professional enough without being blah. So in other words, they suit me to a tee. Who says your mid 30s have to be boring and humdrum? Of course, it helps to have the ace of a wife that I do that pretty much flattered and sweet talked me into purchasing them. Seriously, she should work for these people.

So tomorrow I shall shuffle off to work in my new slacks as I just can't wait to wear them. And you can bet I will get TONS of mileage out of the word as my disdain for the word is well known at my work place.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yes, but the real question is whether you should put a moist salve on your pussy pimple. (Three people should be wincing at some point during that sentence.)

Blue denim slacks. Must stop giggling....

Yuяi said...

I got a big ole laugh out of "polyester hell pants"! What an image!

D'luv said...

Awww... always loved Beezus & Ramona. Beverly Cleary was only trumped by Judy Blume when I was a kid!